Lost

  • Lost
  • 16 weeks pregnant and honestly feeling worse as time goes on. I have 2 step children (live in home due to court order) and 2 biological children age 3 and 2. I can’t hold a job down because my anxiety gets so bad that I physically can’t do it anymore. It cause anxiety attacks and I cry the entire time I work. I can’t keep up at home and my SO’s family thinks I am attention seeking and lazy. I have all of my kids on a bedtime schedule so I can get a break even on the weekends. With that I stick to a strict schedule with them because it helps me especially since my SO works a lot. They think I am selfish because of it…. I am scared to go through another pregnancy seeing as I am struggling with my handful already. My friends have all vanished because I have so many kids and my family was abusive so I have no support there either. I am not suicidal as far as wanting to harm myself physically but some days I wonder if it would be better if something happened to me. My OB quit this week so I can’t call about my depression and other mental health issues… I am just lost and honestly being this lonely doesn’t help…

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